![]() Such Twos actively encourage dependencies in others so that they can feel needed. Unhealthy Two energy can sometimes manifest in what is known as the classic co-dependent personality. Under such circumstances they can become hysterical, irrational and even abusive. When Twos become truly unhealthy, they begin to fear that the love and appreciation that they so deeply desire will never materialize. When they don’t receive what they feel is owed them, they can become bossy and manipulative, feeling entirely justified in being so, because they “have earned the right” and because their intentions are good. Twos tend to feel that, because they have extended themselves for others, gratitude is actually owed to them they are entitled to it. They tend to overestimate the nature and extent of what they have given however, so that the ledger of debit and credit always seems to remain in the Two’s favor. And what they want in return for their service is the undying gratitude of those that they serve and to have their self-image as being loving and selfless reenforced. The dark side of type Two revolves around their frequently unacknowledged need for appreciation. In an increasingly fractured society, they are often the ones working indefatigably to make sure that everyone is cared for. They are the ones who make sure that large families get together for reunions – they cook the food and strongly encourage everyone to attend. Twos often serve as the social “glue” which, for instance, keeps the office staff informed of everyone’s birthday – they are the ones who pass the cards around for others to sign. The Two’s self-image of being giving and helpful is not at all without merit. It is entirely true that Twos are other oriented individuals who provide a great deal of nurturing and support to those in their charge. This competitiveness is at cross purposes with the Two’s desire to be admired for virtue however, so the Two tends to keep this dynamic in check and is frequently unaware of its existence. Twos who adopt the seductive approach are often competitive with members of the same sex and jealous of those they deem more desirable. Seductive Twos are often performers or entertainers they simultaneously give their performance while receiving the adulation of their audience. This might seem at odds with the description of Twos as being “mothering,” but both seductiveness and nurturing are manifestations of the same unconsciously manipulative desire to find a way to engage the other’s attention. ![]() Twos are often seductive in their presentation. This is true whether the Two is male or female, although these qualities will typically be societally reinforced in female Twos and somewhat suppressed in males. Twos are also drawn to the role of parent – specifically what we traditionally think of as the more nurturing, mothering role. Metaphorically speaking, the Two is not afraid of rolling up the sleeves and getting the hands dirty. They tend to be practical people who thrive in the “hands on” helping professions such as teaching, nursing and counseling. They place a very high value on their personal relationships and devote an enormous amount of time and energy to them. ![]() They are emotionally demonstrative and are generally comfortable with the physical expression of emotions. ![]() They need to be appreciated they need to be needed they need to receive a considerable amount of attention and gratitude. In reality, the situation is a bit more complex, as Twos also have needs. They want to occupy a central position in the lives of chosen others, and they accomplish this by being “indispensable.” From the standpoint of the Two, it is always others who are needy and dependent, not the Two. Twos see themselves as being not only strong enough to care for themselves, but able to care for others as well. This places Twos, even though they are serving others, in a sort of “one up” position with respect to those they are serving. Twos have a built in radar for what the other might need, and they see themselves as the correct person for satisfying that need. People of Enneatype Two are essentially related to other people, and they relate to them from a standpoint of helpfulness. ![]()
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